Friday, February 25, 2005

Tomorrow will never come...

It seems that all our live is spent on tomorrow or some betterment of ourselves. Somehow no matter what we have is just not enough. It seems to create a certain feeling of uneasiness inside, a certain dis-satisfaction and when I have that feeling I cannot enjoy or even see what's going on around me such as the wind in the tree branches, the birds sharing a tree with squirels on even the deathening silence of it all. Noooooo, I'm too preoccupied with my "career", my "future", will you like me, am I good enough, will I be rejected by the group. This happens in high school and throughout our lives. What a hell! My feelings and mental state depending on others. If there is such a thing as hell this would be it.
Now of course the "system" doesn't want you to think or be outside the box even if they tell you to.
If one person is not affected by the emotional manipulations of the group then he is a threat to this system. It's like having no buttons to push. Without these buttons they can't convince you to slave your whole life for a system that promises a beautiful retirement. Oh yeah! give me your prime lives. I don't buy it! Don't get me wrong, the system has its place. It's great to have a system for roads, buildings, electricity, water, etc... anything material. But this is where it stops.
No system has the right to tell me how I should feel or think and especially punish me if I don't comply....
System, I am done with you.
Only then can you be trully free.
Most relationships, and I don't mean couples, are thwarted by desire. "what can I get from you or from this encounter". what can I accomplish. It's like this Yoga thing that hit our culture. Everyone's doing yoga and they treat it like somesort of aerobics. These people are doing "power yoga". They are accomplishing something very important. "Here's how you do it to get the maximum benefits", etc... come join our club we have the best facility, the best teachers, etc...
They can't seem to get out of the race. Everything is about getting somewhere, always better....
I thought yoga was to get out of the race, to chill, quiet the mind and body. That means that I cannot have ANY expectation of outcome other wise I'll be preoccupied with reaching my goal. How can you relax when you have to get somewhere?
I've dropped out of the race. I don't buy this great retirement or this heaven or nirvana or enlightenment. It's all a trick! Someone is trying to sell you something. NO ONE can show how to become enlightenment because to "become" means that you're denying who or what you are right now and in that there conflict and where there is conflict there is no peace or enjoyment.

2 comments:

dominique said...

Funny, the preoccupation with the future... Ah, the future... When... If... Yoga... unity... now... Oh, yes, i have a great teacher and a great facility and a great and a great and a great and someday I will learn how to be in flow. Well stop crazy and LOOK. Learning about how to be now is a crazy as it sounds...JUST STOP!!! just stop

David said...

I feel the same way and this feeling has been tormenting me for the past few years... One thing that has made me more aware of the big picture, and I believe that you're on to it also, is to live in the moment as much as possible - trying not to live for the future or being stuck in the past too much. It's tough though... very tough. Anyway, I'd like to share with you one of my interests that I find to be very uplifting in that it opens my mind to the big picture, and ultimately makes me feel more secure so I can continue on day to day... I LOVE to read and listen to channelled masters: kryon.com, kirael.com, etc. Check 'em out if you like. It's very uplifting and informational!P.S. Good seeing you in the park today!